neutral_spree (neutral_spree) wrote,

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"the world is as soft as lace," but i don't love anyone

"if there's something that i learned when i was still a child
it's to take a hiding"

this is rilo, named after rilo kiley.

i have a love/hate relationship with this cat. pretty much because i hate cats & it's ashley's. however, i'm making the best of this situation and attempting to love it anyways. we'll see. it whines and screams too much, and adam compared cats to gay men. i kind of have to agree. i'm not a catty person & thusly do not approve of cats in general.

so my faith in people (and sadly, some of my friends) is fleeting. i hate feeling like i can count on people for things (even inconsequential things) and then accordingly be let down. but that's life. ha.

i've spent a lot of time by myself this weekend thus far, and even worse, much of it was spent with the cat. i'm like that crazy spinster cat lady. everyone else around here (aka ft worth) is seemingly content and warm and fuzzy. i feel disconnected. it's not neccessarily a bad thing; it quite simply is. pedro the lion wrote a song that would describe me right now, but i'm not as familiar with it & far too lazy to look up the lyrics at this point in time.

isn't it strange how you find yourself longing for times that didn't seem special, but in retrospect are beautiful? i have a handfull of memories that are stored away that i wish i could relive because i didn't appreciate them at the time. i didn't realize how times were so much simpler, so i'm attempting to take advantage of this moment and this time, just in case it will one day translate into a pretty memory that i'll long for. it's impossible though, because some things are only nicer as a memory. that's sad, but that's life. and this is a wine-buzzed, light-weight leslie talking.

i have a $15 itunes gift certificate, and i'm trying to decide what to spend it on. any suggestions? i'm in desperate need of some new music - music that i'll inevitably associate with the end of february/beginning of march next year.

i need a rockin' mixtape. anyone game for trading?

PS, i just looked up those pedro lyrics and they weren't fitting at all. oh well.
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